Today’s Joy Dare: 3 hard eucharisteo
“Everything is eucharisteo. Because eucharisteo is how Jesus, at the Last Supper, showed us to transfigure all things – take the pain that is given, give thanks for it, and transform it into a joy that fulfills all emptiness. This, is the hard eucharisteo. Lean into the ugly and whisper thanks to transfigure it into beauty.” {From One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp}
I struggle with anxiety, which is ultimately a heart issue. I doubt the Lord’s goodness and provision. I want to be in control. I don’t trust His sovereign control. I want to be in control. My anxiety become more prominent two years ago when I had a panic attack. Since then, God has worked tremendous healing in my heart. He has taken away an addictive sin I have struggled with and has replaced it with love and devotion to Him. His Holy Spirit has taught me how to read Scripture as truth and has opened my eyes to the treasures found there. He has used the power of His living and active Word to change my perspective on many aspects of my life and has brought me contentment and joy.
Yet the struggle with anxiety remains.
Why, Lord, have You not taken away this struggle? I don’t want to be this way. Lately the anxiety has not been as frequent, but on the worst days I end up feeling discouraged. Why did I start to panic? Why did I let it get so bad that I felt sick? Why can’t I just trust the Lord? I understand where my anxiety comes from, but I can’t seem to stop it sometimes. I hate it… and yet I am starting to see how the gospel is becoming more and more precious to me because of my struggle with sin. For that I am thankful.
“There is therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free from the law of sin and death.” (Romans 8:1-2)
How great is the mercy and grace of God that He welcomes me with open arms when I run to Him in repentance! I don’t have to feel shame in failure because Christ’s sacrifice covers all my attempts to be perfect. In Christ I am set free from the punishment of my sin (death). I don’t have to earn favor with God because Christ’s righteousness covers me completely.
Should I not then be thankful for this struggle, if that is what will point me to humbly depend on the cross of Christ?
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